Tranquility as defined in the Merriam Webster’s Dictionary is to be free from agitation of mind or spirit; free from disturbance or turmoil; unvarying in aspect: steady, stable.We should all should seek to maintain our tranquility in our lives amongst the many obstacles and angst we experience in our lives that attempt to disturb our tranquility. We all experience various external, and internal stressors that attempt to take away our tranquility and make us react rather than reflect then react. For instance, you could be having a perfectly tranquil and serene drive into your favorite coffee shop, place of work, school etc, and experience another driver cutting you off from your intended route. Many of us react to this situation by slamming on the horn, and yelling expletives at the individual we felt did us a disservice.
Science has shown us that these type of aggressions disturb our mental and physical state, often causing blood pressure to spike, stress hormones to release into the bloodstream, blood vessels to constrict, and the heart to begin to beat faster. The latter can slowly impact your well-being on a repeated basis; and ultimately could lead to a stress induced heart attack which could in turn end your life.
As I’ve grown as a parent, and a husband, I have learned the technique of not letting anyone disturb my tranquility. That is, to not allow individuals or external forces the power to have command over how I might react to perceived stressor. When something is beginning to induce stress in your life you should refrain from reacting, and begin to think first, and remember that you are not in a fight or flight situation. That is, a situation whereas your only options are to participate in a fight or to flee the situation. Our mind often fools us into thinking that we are in a situation where a lion is roaring and chasing us and we have to protect ourselves from the impending threat.
Let’s all take a step back in situations where our tranquility is about to be disturbed and reflect and realize that there is no lion, and then react to the situation at hand in a relaxed and measured manner. The antithesis of reacting in a measured and relaxed approach is anger, and I can assure you that nothing good can come out of reacting out of anger. The ancient Greek philosopher, Seneca, has a famous quote on this from his essay titled ‘On anger’ excerpted from ‘The ancient art of stoic joy’ by William B. Irvine states that,
Anger itself is brief insanity. No plaque has cost the human race more. Because of anger we see all around us people being killed, poisoned, and sued; we see cities and nations ruined. And besides destroying our cities and nations, anger can destroy us individually. We live in a world, after all, in which there is much to be angry about, meaning that unless we can learn to control our anger, we will be perpetually angry. Being angry is a waste of precious time”
Seneca the younger, who lived from 4 B.C. to 65 A.D. experienced the same problems in dealing with a world where there was so much to be angry about. I implore all of us to learn from his lessons, and not let the brief insanity of anger run tyrannically through our lives. In the contemporary society that we live in America where citizens are incarcerated into prisons at some of the highest rates in the world, we must learn to manage our anger and aggressions. Let’s not let anyone or anything disturb or take our tranquility. Techniques to maintain your tranquility:
Fight the tendency to think the worst of others that do you a disservice or jump to conclusions about their motivations for their actions, maybe they were having a bad day (death in family, infidelity, Job loss, etc.
Don’t be corrupted by pleasure. That is, understand that things will not always go smoothly. Life ain’t all rosebuds, you gotta take your lumps.
As I stated earlier, understand that things that attempt to cause us to be angry are mere annoyances and do us no real harm.
When angry take all steps to turn all anger’s indications into opposites. That is, if you’re angry force yourself to relax your face, soften your face, and walk at a more measured, and slower pace.
I hope some of these techniques help you in keeping others from disturbing our tranquility.
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